with the loss of one, another is born. who can uphold such optimism in the loss of a loved one?
not for the time being...watching his parents so aggrieved...my heart tore apart...
As a friend, i already feel the hurt, the pain, the sudden loss. the disbelief. perhaps a little anger.
why...when such cruel jokes are played.
for 2 days, i told myself to never let my tears fall. because, i convinced myself, he left a deep impression in our lives, he was loved, he was a great gentleman, he was an avid sportsman, he was always happy. then today, as the news reported again, the tears fell like torrents.
when the memories came flooding back at me. it was too much to bear...for many of us i think.
he wasn't what the papers said..."little else was known of him".
although we weren't that close in rv...we got to know each other better in sajc. ocip days...i ran through the photos today...and my heart wrenched again.
when was the last time i saw him?
what were the last words he said to me?
how did his grin looked like?
what did we bicker about for fun?
why is everything now in the past tense?
i realised i've lost touch with so many people.
and it's funny, how the death of one can lead to the congregating...the gathering of many--once lost touched too.
everyone is tied to one string or another. what's yours?
santos raak. the big big family.
our house-building team. the bonds. the sweat and tears. the joy and laughter.
look! one house...
our wall. ournames. your name.
the guys crack me up. because seeing your grin makes me smile.
it is too late to regret...isn't it?
life goes on...the pain exists...but it'll fade, won't it?
what am i supposed to feel now?
should i be glad he has gone to a more peaceful place? should i be upset because i miss him?
the cycle...balance..where is the balance here?
on the truck we sit everyday, your grin joins ours and we make merry in the chilling wind.
on the friendship bridge..we took the picture in the sunset.
the guys...
why...i never really believed in any Gods. there is a Higher Power...but what's the reason? why? do i even have the right to feel like this? who am i to him? in my mind, he has always been my buddy, a good brother brother.
happy days, happy memories...
our memebership! (:
post ocip; concert outing...
and on the last day of school...were you the one who came jostling through the crowd and exclaim:"there you are! the rest of the brothers waiting for you to take picture!"
hahaha...i still remember so clearly...how touched i was to be included.
a tribute to you. for being such a wonderful friend. a great buddy and brother. for lighting up my days with your smile. for being such a gentleman.
i'm glad to have known you. you will be remembered by me always. by us.
i miss you. i hope you are happy where ever you are. do rest in peace.
may everyone be safe and sound.
it's time i start "re-finding" back all my lost friends...friendships should never grow cobwebs. never. unless you want to live in regret...
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