i should not have seen that.

those nudges, what are the meanings behind?
there was no need for all to stare right?
i wonder what was the reason. please don't let it be a bad one. =(

thinking about all those deadlines and projects due is pissing me off.
response paper to conquer. pekcek.

let's not even talk about STUDYING.
i feel like i'm procrastinating everything. and i hate my actions utterly.
it's time i discipline myself.

school is just another cycle of events, repeating again and again.
sometimes it gets worse, sometimes it's good.

today's socio was CRAP. i'm kinda ashamed at myself. sighs.
i don't feel alive at all.
i need to psycho myself into feeling energetic and.......happy.

i've come to realise how extreme i am.
it's either this or that.
study hard or start flunking.
fucking bloody emo or crazily high.
extremely pale or damn black.
super unhealthy or super health-conscious
geez, when will i find that balance?????
i need that balance in life. i'm tired of scrambling for my life.

what lies ahead?
again, i recall glenda's esl: if you had a book which records your past, present AND future. it is right infront of you, would you pick it up to find out what your future would be?

my answer was no. being that blur sotong optimistic me, i said that what will come will come, might as well let it surprise me and learn in the process.

now, i'm torn. can i choose chapters to read? lol.
knowing changes your path.
that's the power of knowledge, indeed.