the in between.

nye: met up with the 4d peeps over at holland v to eat dinner at nydc. really glad i did cos' i do miss them.
meeting was short, but good. recalled those classroom days, the falling asleep, the geography lessons, the teachers, the terrors, the jokes, the classmates, and figuring out what happened to them.

i miss them. 4dynamic will always stay as one. -smiles-

afterwhich, the nehneh hel came and we took the bus to DG mrt. yea, met alex there, and another girl (Ya en? correct?) and leon and beng came over in his merc to fetch us there. abs joined the squeezed gang on the car and i had to sit on nehneh's lap. @#@!$!$#!$ i could feel myself flying everytime stupid beng swerved. but wells, car rides are much appreciated. =)

the labyrinth was good. smokey but good. alcohol was no lack of. but i was TRYING to abstain, seriously. i kept thinking of the hangover i'll get if i really did drink, and that made me drink less. i still love my friends even if they smoke, they should know that.


anyhow, the countdown was funny. lol. i did enjoy myself.


it did not start the way i wanted it to. but things happen for a reason. i'm tired of figuring things out, when questions just keep popping up. i tried to take things lightly, and not look into them at all, but sometimes i just don't understand why life is playing this joke on me.

seems too cruel.


being in between sober and wasted is just...LOUCHI. FUCK. seriously, if i had to choose, i'll never be this in between. cos....i don't even know what i'm feeling now. @#!$#$#!@$!

i'll get wasted anytime.

at least i feel happy. HAHAHAHA.

it's a well spent and eventful NYE and NY. and my curfew was extended ONE HOUR cos of the countdown. YAYS. and everyone seems to know i'm cinderella. =)

once again, i feel blessed because of the friends i have. and i hope this feeling stays.

sounds damn grossly romantised and cliche i know, but it's just what i feel. i don't wanna murder myself anymore, because i know there's support when i need it, where i can easily find it.

now, i feel like going on a speed ride. just feel the wind whipping across my face, and chill running down my back, and feel nothing but fear, anticipation, and plain indulgence.

for you were the first to msg me in 2007.
and you the first to call in 2007.
how fucking coincidental.