hues.

the sunset captured at udon thani.
pretty.
innocence and simplicity.
that village life.


if nothing goes wrong, i should be going to chalet tonight, and be back on friday morning.
so pissed with my father. and mother.
the more you oppose my thoughts and actions, the more i want to do it.
don't you ever get it?
people do grow up and grow old. by showing that you'll never trust me, i can't even be bothered to earn that trust. you simply make me detest u more. detest this home. what kind of parents do i have? what kind of daughter am i? i'm tired of this shit man. so what if i'm not doing what a good daughter should be doing? you made me not want to care about anything regarding family. you make me hate coming home.

it's...not even called a home anymore.
how often do you see parents getting mad over slightest things?
i wish i had your parents.
i wish i could soar and fly.
give me a little more freedom without nagging so much.
the more you give, maybe the more i won't want it.
it's the tension of opposites.

my friends are not fucking hooligans or bad company.
i'm so sick of you accusing my friends.
so what if they do go home later and have more fun than others? it just doesn't justify that.
so what if i like people like them? are you afraid i'll become like them? afraid you cannot control me? i'm a fucking 19 year old man.
generation gap.
maybe because i can never be like them?
everything i do, there's this reign over me.
i'm struggling so hard to break free.
the contempt is growing.

i'm only young once. i just wanna have fun.
can't i?

i need a fucking job.
fucking desperate for money.
go rob some ulu supermarket like sucre?
HAHAHAH.
just enough to get pass xmas eh, abs?

geez.
desperation.
salvation.
WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?


and there are unwanted attention.
unwanted invites.
yet i cannot decline.
feels wrong to. niceness of them maybe?
why do i keep thinking they have ulterior motives?
why are you so nice to me?